The Perpetual Search For The Absurd

Have you ever just looked up into the night sky, and felt completely lost? I mean I'm just an insignificant human, slowly atrophying on an insignificant rock in an ever-expanding universe.

The day I realised this changed my perspective on everything. Life is simpler before this aphorism catches up with you. And have no doubts, it has always been there. Ever since you were safely inside your mother's womb, sharing everything with her, there was a seed developing in the centre of your mind, just waiting to be nourished. It was developing just as surely as your arms and your legs and your fingernails. It thrives on your insecurity -- the umbillical cord is severed, your parents force you to leave their safe hands and fend for yourself in school, your peers tease you because you have yet to experience your first kiss, somebody close to you dies for the first time -- and it grows and grows until one day your apprehension blossoms, and you're left lost and empty and wondering why your heart stubbornly keeps beating.

So with this knowledge firmly to the forefront of your mind, how can you possibly still function as society demands? How can I get out of bed in the morning and go to sleep at night knowing that anything I have achieved in the interim has done nothing but brought me a day closer to death? Should I simply put a gun to my head and write off my life as a cruel joke? Perhaps. But consider the effect your death would have on those closest to you. Does the fact that your friends and family would be crushed if you die then, by proxy, provide a meaning to your life? Can living for the sake of others be classified as 'living'?

Many people turn to religion to provide meaning to their lives. Only fear of death and the need for meaning could drive otherwise rational people to believe in an invisible dictator in the sky. Some extremists are even so determined to find significance in their lives that they are willing to kill and die for it. Religion must be a comfort when a loved one dies, or indeed when you yourself are close to death. However, from an atheist's point of view, I would prefer to live my life knowing that when it's over, it's over, instead of living in blissful ignorance.

The author and philosopher Albert Camus developed a philosophy called Absurdism. Camus argues that yes, life is devoid of meaning, but it is through the acceptance of this fact that one becomes free. Once you embrace it, you are free to create your own meanings in life. It is not necessary to take all of this as one concrete philosophy. I like to extract the bits that make sense to me, and mix them with my own ideologies and life experiences. You create your own unique ideals; you decipher universals subjectively and thus through your own unique set of values, you have achieved both freedom and meaning in your life.